Your pencil skirt

So you are in love with someone else,
someone who burns within your soul,
I hear you've never felt so alive,
so much desire beyond control.

When we spent summers at the waterfalls
and you said these were the perfect days,
I believed you.
Now you can tell some lies about the good times you haven't had
But I have tongued you more than twice,
and I like it when you tell me to stop,
Oh its turning me on oN ON,
When you raise your pencil skirt,
Like a veil before my eyes.

Well i know that you are engaged to him,
But i know you want something to play with.
I'll be around when he is not in town,
Then I'll show you how you are doing it wrong.
We share the same city and feel the same song
so when winter comes and the bomb drops
don't let me be the last to know
How you are feeling, where you are.

Creation is gone crazy and the TV is mad
Now you are the only sane thing that I have.

I Do, I Will, I Have

How wise I am to have instructed the butler
to instruct the first footman to instruct the second
footman to instruct the doorman to order my carriage;
I am about to volunteer a definition of marriage.

Just as I know that there are two Hagens, Walter and Copen,
I know that marriage is a legal and religious alliance entered
into by a man who can't sleep with the window shut and a
woman who can't sleep with the window open.
Moreover, just as I am unsure of the difference between
flora and fauna and flotsam and jetsam,
I am quite sure that marriage is the alliance of two people
one of whom never remembers birthdays and the other
never forgetsam,
And he refuses to believe there is a leak in the water pipe or
the gas pipe and she is convinced she is about to asphyxiate
or drown,
And she says, Quick get up and get my hairbrushes off the
windowsill, it's raining in, and he replies, Oh they're all right,
it's only raining straight down.

That is why marriage is so much more interesting than divorce,
Because it's the only known example of the happy meeting of
the immovable object and the irresistible force.
So I hope husbands and wives will continue to debate and
combat over everything debatable and combatable,
Because I believe a little incompatibility is the spice of life,
particularly if he has income and she is pattable.


Ogden Nash